"Death-defying" BBQ Sauce

Death Defying BBQ sauce:
(this is mainly a guideline to create the base sauce; as with anything, it is designed for improvisation. All measurements are approximate and can be adjusted to taste...)

Equipment: 
Deep saucepan with a lid that fits
Long spoon
Wire whisk
A well-ventilated area that is cleared of all flammable objects (not kidding about this)
long-handled lighter (aim 'n flame or similar)

Dry ingredients:
Brown sugar (a large handful; approx 1 cup)
Paprika (approx 2 tablespoons)
Dry Mustard (approx 2 teaspoons)
Onion powder (approx 2 teaspoons) 
Ground black pepper 
Kosher salt or sea salt (go sparingly on this; the meat will already be salty)
Garlic powder (small amount when cooking beef; I usually leave out the garlic for pork)
Cayenne pepper (depending on how much kick you like)
(*Beef option: Onion soup mix)

Liquids: Bourbon (at least 2 cups)
(*note: Rum may be substituted for bourbon for a slightly mellower, sweeter flavor)
Apple juice (approx 1 cup)
Apple cider vinegar (about a cup)
(distilled white vinegar works too)

Options (use one or more of these depending on your taste preference and choice of meat)
Tomato paste
Yellow mustard
Dijon mustard 
Honey
Maple syrup



1. Start with the bourbon and the brown sugar. 
1a. It is important to taste-test the bourbon for quality SEVERAL times throughout the cooking process. Begin the quality-assurance process by pouring yourself a shot.
2. In a saucepan, pour about a cup of the bourbon in. Taste-test for quality assurance.
3. heat to NEAR boiling while you add the brown sugar and stir with a whisk to dissolve. 
4. At this point it should be emphasized to maintain proper safety at all times. 
4a. Drink a shot of the bourbon for luck. 
5. Set the bourbon-sugar on fire with the lighter, stirring frequently with the long spoon. Keep the lid handy to clamp down in case it gets out of hand. (It's good to do this before the bourbon reaches full boiling or the alcohol vapor will ignite above the pot and you'll have a big problem.)
Ideally what should happen is that the sugar will Carmelize and give it a nice flavor. 
6. Clamp the lid on it to put the fire out. 
6a. At this point, if you're still alive and your house isn't burned down, pour yourself another shot to celebrate your accomplishment.
7. Add the apple juice and the rest of the spices. Bring it back to a full boil again, then reduce heat and simmer while the rest of the alcohol cooks off. 
7a. I use onion soup instead of apple juice when I'm making sauce for beef dishes. Take the onion soup mix and blend with hot water according to the package, then add this to the sauce instead of the apple juice. 
8. Add the vinegar and continue to simmer.
9. Taste the mixture. Adjust any spice quantities at this point to your preference.
10. Add your choice of either tomato paste or mustard. Or varying amounts of both.
11. Resample the flavor. If it's too intense, you can add more apple juice. 
11a. Resample the bourbon. 
12. Thats it; you can either use it to mop the meat while it cooks, or you can add corn starch and thicken it to make table sauce. 

Enjoy!